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SMARTY.

The human side of business

Archives for April 2018

Big Life

Rattled.

April 17, 2018 · By Amy Swift Crosby

When someone shakes your cage, it can be hard to shake it off. A lingering psychic residue is often the by-product of an aggressive, insensitive or otherwise unexpected email, phone call or confrontation.

Thick skin, as some are quick to suggest, must be nice. But thick skin can’t be grown overnight. And even if it could, I’m not sure I’d like to insulate myself from everything it keeps out.

Being in the eye of anyone’s storm is unsettling at the very least. The chest tightens. There’s a destabilization that undermines even the most anchored human being.

Most people remember being yelled at as a child, usually by a parent who had lost cool, patience or wits. If it was a rare event, you learned that all people, even the best of them, have limitations. But if it was a common one, you learned something else.

You might have learned you were stupid.
Or worthless.
Or, that even where there’s love, there’s great unpredictability.
Maybe that early loss evolves into fear of losing control, lack of trust, a trigger for anger. It may sow deep, unresolved rage.

We have no idea who is walking around with what.
Until we get punched.

When I am on the receiving end of an explosive or otherwise unconscionable communication, I’m undone by the circumstances so much that the genesis of the other person’s unraveling rarely enters my consciousness. I don’t much care about why they are the way they are, and quickly move to a change of scenery or decompression as a means of recovery.

But that strategy doesn’t always deliver the emotional cleansing I’d hoped for. Instead, imagining what it must be like to be the person living with the kind of turmoil that causes them to lose it; of actually caring about why someone overreacted, rather than dismissing it, is a relatively accessible way to get out from under it.

While distress doesn’t typically have an expiration date, doing nothing to understand the source of the wound in others leaves it too free to wander in our own beings. Unchecked, it can show up later as something we may not like.

Practicing empathy is what allows us to see beyond what was done to us, to get a different view of the other. At a minimum, it wrangles and contains trauma. But better yet, it cultivates a quality worth having.

Big Brands

Lego.

April 4, 2018 · By Amy Swift Crosby

Superfans / employees / customer service hero’s.

Wouldn’t you know it that just days after posting about uninspired environments (see Malls), I had a rather wonderful experience inside of just such a place.

My youngest daughter is healthily obsessed with Lego, especially their collection designed for the younger (seemingly female) set, called Lego Friends. I mean healthy because she wakes up early to do Lego, she goes to bed thinking about Lego, she asks for sets by name for every occasion or holiday – and when she’s in the middle of a build – nothing can get in her way.

On a recent Saturday, we found ourselves sans schedule – and she asked if we could super pretty please go to the Lego store…at the mall. Normally, I might invent any excuse to avoid this excursion, but the day was unusually open – I could make her really happy – and she wanted to buy herself a birthday present with money saved from her allowance. So, game on.

The last thing I expected to encounter on this excursion was a dynamic duo of super fan sales associates who’d landed the ultimate gig in their mind; selling Lego. Unlike the catatonic attitude that plagues many mall-based retail employees, these two grown men were eager to explain scenes, sets, and models, suggesting ideas from other collections for unique “builds.” Not only did they know everything there was to know about the Friends collection (definitely not their demo), they exchanged stories of their own Lego projects at home, even down to which characters loved what and what pattern was on whose bunk bed.

This may come off as slightly odd (I had a thought or two), as most adults see Lego as a children’s activity that is ultimately outgrown. But these gentlemen took great pride in their roles, even in educating us about the lifespan of Lego interest. Apparently, it stops around 12 or 13 but then picks up again approximately 15 years later. (Considering how many of these things we have in our playroom, what I really wanted to know was how long it takes for Lego to accrue enough value to become a vintage collector’s item.)

It is refreshing to see people who, even at an hourly wage, totally and completely love the products they sell. They won me over, so much so, that I will no longer be buying Lego at the much-more-convenient online superstore with a free shipping membership, but instead, will actually seek out ….the mall. Why? Because it’s more fun!

And, in case you were wondering…Lego – even when it’s plural – is always Lego. And if you really consider yourself a fan, it’s LEGO. #themoreyouknow.

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About Me

photo of Amy Swift Crosby

Amy Swift Crosby is a brand strategist and copywriter who has positioned or voiced messaging across the commercial spectrum, from icons like Ford, BVLGARI, Pottery Barn, Pantene and Virgin, to boutique brands like The Wild Unknown, fitness franchise Barre3 and the rebrand of legendary metaphysical bookstore, Bodhi Tree. She has leveraged this expertise to help entrepreneurial women and small businesses owners hone their skills, mission and message, while uncovering their own “voice.” This blog explores “the human side of business,” and universal themes like uncertainty, anxiety, the tension between engagement and disconnection, personal value and most importantly, of finding - and hearing - our own voices in our everyday life.

Photo - Andrew Stiles

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SMARTY began as a thriving community in Los Angeles and Boston with weekly panel discussions and events designed to better understand the mindset and growth strategies behind successful entrepreneurs. Today, SMARTY is a weekly blog written by Amy Swift Crosby who chronicles her life as a creative, parent, entrepreneur and spiritual seeker. As an urban refugee living in a New England seaside village, she unpacks topics ranging from uncertainty and doubt to the built environment and advertising. More on Amy.

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